2008 Woodie Awards
College Co-ed's quest for fast food nirvana on the cheap
Corey Hodges and R.J. Boutelle, Collegian correspondents
Issue date: 5/9/08 Section: Arts & Living
Here's the scene: It's approaching midnight on a Friday. You go to the University of Massachusetts, so naturally you're probably engaging in some questionable activities, with or without friends. You're mellowing out, watching the tube, when suddenly - a wretched sound is unearthed from the inner depths of your stomach, a sound capable of converting even the most passionate atheist into a God-fearing churchgoer.
You try to ignore ravenous hunger, which has started to consume your every thought. However, the television programmers have different ideas: commercial after commercial of late-night fast food vendors. Secretly, you accuse the television programmers of being the bastard children of sin itself, but they're right: One glance at the Golden Arches, the smiling redhead, or the distinguished colonel and they've got you hooked faster than the tobacco companies.
You need food, and not just any food will do. Those sinister commercials have sown the seeds of desire and now only the savory nectars of the fast food industry will stay your culinary lust.
A quick look in your wallet reminds you that you are indeed still in college. We'll assume you've got a car (or Bob across the hall will let you borrow his) but alas, funds are tight.
Fortunately, every fast food chain has a "dollar menu," which, despite the falling value of the dollar, will remain constant because it comprises the majority of the franchise's revenue.
But you're in the mood for something a little different. As those blasted commercials have been advertising for some time now, the "chicken snack wrap" (CSW) is making its mark on every fast food, world stage.
CSWs have recently become menu staples at a triumvirate of fast food chains: Wendy's, McDonald's and KFC. Our researchers sampled from each of these uber-American fast food palaces to bring you the facts.
These CSWs come in two broad varieties: crispy and grilled.
In comparison, grilled chicken has obvious health benefits: lower calorie count, lower cholesterol, no carbs, lower sodium, etc. However, if we are to remain true to our American roots as big fatties, the mere thought of this grilled subset of poultry should be an affront to our very nature.
You try to ignore ravenous hunger, which has started to consume your every thought. However, the television programmers have different ideas: commercial after commercial of late-night fast food vendors. Secretly, you accuse the television programmers of being the bastard children of sin itself, but they're right: One glance at the Golden Arches, the smiling redhead, or the distinguished colonel and they've got you hooked faster than the tobacco companies.
You need food, and not just any food will do. Those sinister commercials have sown the seeds of desire and now only the savory nectars of the fast food industry will stay your culinary lust.
A quick look in your wallet reminds you that you are indeed still in college. We'll assume you've got a car (or Bob across the hall will let you borrow his) but alas, funds are tight.
Fortunately, every fast food chain has a "dollar menu," which, despite the falling value of the dollar, will remain constant because it comprises the majority of the franchise's revenue.
But you're in the mood for something a little different. As those blasted commercials have been advertising for some time now, the "chicken snack wrap" (CSW) is making its mark on every fast food, world stage.
CSWs have recently become menu staples at a triumvirate of fast food chains: Wendy's, McDonald's and KFC. Our researchers sampled from each of these uber-American fast food palaces to bring you the facts.
These CSWs come in two broad varieties: crispy and grilled.
In comparison, grilled chicken has obvious health benefits: lower calorie count, lower cholesterol, no carbs, lower sodium, etc. However, if we are to remain true to our American roots as big fatties, the mere thought of this grilled subset of poultry should be an affront to our very nature.
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